She’s gay too. Gretchen, not Regina. Dear god, if Regina was gay I would die. Hilarity would ensue ten fold that of when she tripped up the stairs…while she was carrying paint. Classic. Anyway, yeah, so Gretchen is gay. I don’t know from personal experience, but I wouldn’t touch that girl with a 39 and a half foot pole. (I apologize for all the movie references by the way, film is my life). She’s experienced to say the least. She’s the Pillsbury Dough Boy of our school. Just about everyone, guys included, has had a poke. That thought alone makes me shiver.

You’re probably confused right? I say she’s gay and then I say she’s been with guys? Yeah well, this girl likes to claim she’s bi, but we all know that the times she’s been with boys is when the alcohol was flowing. I guess her mom is uber religious freak so that’s why she brings the boys around. From what I hear though, people only stay for one night. Guess she’s not that great.

Back to that neurotic head case Regina though. I guess you could consider her a, continuing with the Mean Girls theme I’ve set up, “regulation hottie.” All the boys want her; all the girls want to be her. Well, ok not all the girls, but you know what I’m saying. She thinks her shit doesn’t stink. She walks around like she owns the school, which in a sense she sort of does. You’d think she’d use her influence to help out her sister once in a while. I’m not saying that K needs help with anything, because she so doesn’t. I’m saying she could at least acknowledge her presence when they’re around each other, which, thanks to Regina, doesn’t happen quite often.

Like I said, she takes K for granted in a major way. Like, we’re talking avoidance of the plague; those are the lengths she goes to avoid her. I wish K would just let me beat her up and teach her some respect, but damn her she won’t let me. Claims she “loves” her, and she probably does. K has a big heart. If only the same could be said for Regina.

There’s really nothing wrong with my girl. So she has a thing for Agent Mulder, tries to be a Hogwarts student every now and then, has seen every LOTR movie at least 50 times and fantasizes about Sam Gamgee, and can probably hack into the CIA mainframe in less time than it takes to make a PBJ. She’s unique and I love that about her.

I could go on and on for pages, but I won’t bore you any longer. I guess the whole reason I started posting here was cause I was looking for a place to get my thoughts out that was more private and more anonymous than a journal hidden in my room. I also wouldn’t mind talking to new people. My school is an obnoxious little bubble and this seems like a good place for escape. It may not seem like it, but I really am a good listener. So, ya know, if you wanna talk…I’m here.

—

I clicked submit and closed the browser. If people read that rant and I just so happened to get a few phone numbers…well I wouldn’t complain. I wasn’t lying when I said I needed a place to get my thoughts out, but I wouldn’t mind reaping the benefits of some girls that decided to message me afterwards.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m no slut. I go on dates, have fun, and sometimes I’ll call the girl again. If I get lucky, then I get lucky. I do have a conscience and have even stopped it from escalating further than a hot and heavy make out session. I’m just not for commitment right now. My last relationship didn’t end very well so I’ve decided to be single for a while.

My phone lit up and blared Irreplaceable; Kyla’s idea…definitely not mine. I flipped it open while I made a mental note to convince her to let me change it.

“Hey Ky, what’s up?”

She groaned into the phone, “Ugh Ash, please come over. The Idiot Brigade is back and I can feel my IQ dropping drastically.”

“I’m sure your IQ is still intact genius,” I lightly laughed. “I’ll be over in a few just hang tight.”

Yet another typical day in the life of Ashley Davies…