Fan Fiction
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Life Happens: The Stoners of LA
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Alice’s eyes teared up. “Awwww….you guys…you’re two of my favorite people ever. I’m so happy for you. Helena loooooooves Bette.” Alice began to giggle rather than cry. “Bette looooooves Helena. Hehehe.” Helena, as it turned out, was a lot less stoned than Alice, so she held Alice up as her fit of giggles worsened.
Suddenly, they could walk no further—they stopped just short of the fenced in cows. Alice immediately climbed over, falling on the other side. She jumped up, brushing herself off, and ran up to one of the big brown beasts.
“Alice!” Helena hissed at her friend. “Alice, stop it! Come back here, right this instance! What on earth are you doing?”
Alice would not look up, and Helena had to speak louder. “Alice, we are not tipping any of these poor cows, if that’s what you’re thinking of doing!”
A surprised and sleepy looking blonde woman peered at Helena from across the broad back of a large brown cow. “Heh?”
Helena climbed over the fence and tried to remember what she had just said—the pot seemed to be kicking in. “Oh…no, we are not tipping this cow. Poor thing.” Helena patted the cow’s nose daintily, worried that some of it would rub onto her. The cow looked utterly uncaring.
“Heh?” Alice couldn’t focus. “Wha…no, we’re not tipping the cow. We’re bringing the cow.”
Both women stopped, stared at one another for a long time, lost in their confused thoughts. “Heh?” Helena asked.
“We’re bringing the cow to Bette. Like a present. A little prezzy. Then we’ll find one for Shane.”
“Ohhhhhhh…” It all made sense to Helena, but she still wasn’t certain that this was a good idea.
“Alice! Helena! What the hell are you two doing?” Bette and Shane approached their friends, but stayed on the other side of the fence.
Helena hissed at them. “Shhhhh! We’re stealing a cow for you both—we’re bringing you this one!” Alice and Helena collapsed in laughter just in front of the cow they had chosen for Bette.
“Guys, uh, I don’t want a cow. Thanks though.” Shane leapt over the fence, helping Helena and Alice out of the mud. They were also both likely covered in other, less pleasant things. Helena picked up some mud and threw it at Shane, who jumped out of the way, just in time. “Oooook, you two. Let’s get you back to the party. We’re going to burn a big fire. This time, I found some sticks that will work.” Helena and Alice strode quickly back to the rest of the group, arm in arm. Helena reached back and hooked Bette in before she could get left behind.
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Am I first, I hope so … I stayed up later than late just to read this lady! and it was worth it, I’m so looking forward to your x-over post, but this deserves merit of it’s own, even if you didn’t tip a cow for me. Incidentally I’m not sure it’s possible, some friends and I tried a few yrs ago on Dartmoor, whilst camping, and stoned, god I loved this chapter, tee hee giggling now … oh and the nc-17 stuff was, y’know, not bad :-D
I guess that earthy smell didn’t translate so well from one story to another, but I quite enjoyed this one as well. Despite the earty smell. I must say, Bette and Helena seem to have quite the sex life together. I’ve never tipped a cow, but I’ve certainly had my share of the spliff. I’d have to say the magic mushrooms were the most giggles, though. Have to be able to trust your source, however.
Stoned Alice and Helena redux: brilliant! Why couldn’t the ski-lift scene have concluded with some Belena action on the show? After all, weren’t they in car 69? I have to agree with Akiracolorblind, this story just goes from strength to strength. Your talent and hard work are much appreciated.
Awesome! Helena but her feelongs for Bette on the line so now they can both have a big sigh of relief; they want each other and love each other and as soon as Bette dumps Jodi and Helena has a little chat w/ Elaine all will be good in the world. So does Bette know that it’s Elaine that Helena was with before she arrived in London w/ the girls? And now that Helena is back in mommy’s good graces when she gets back to the states is she palnning on getting her own place for just her or will she be shacking up w/ Bette? PPS!
aww im lovin this
this is ridiculously amazing!! I mean–I can’t get enough of it! You’re doing a better job every time you write this!! I love every single moment of it..I love the part about giving Bette and Shana a cow as a gift. Helena and Bette were beautiful together in your story! They are meant to be for each other! Please keep up with the good work!! I can’t wait to see what happens next!!!
I’m glad Helena turn Peggy down. It’s about time Helena became her own woman as well as Bette’s. And to stand on her own feet and succeed in doing what we all know she is capable of, is even more of a treat. With the support of her family and friends I see no reason why she would not accomplish her goals. And Bette really needs to break it off with Jodi. If Helena is the one she truly loves, she needs to step up to plate and take that swing at love. We have all probaly struck out once in our lives or more, but somethings are worth taking a chance on. I feel bad for Elaine though she is really in love with Helena, to bad Helena didn’t see that before she slept with her again. Excellent writing I don’t know how you do it, but please keep doing it.