Chapter Nine

Tina Kennard narrative

Bette Porter confused me like hell. I never knew if she was going to ignore me or kiss me. I never knew what was going on in her head.

I needed those walls to be broken through and I would do anything for it. I knew I would succeed in the end, but that didn’t make the frustration less.

Why the hell was she doing this? Why all the pretending? I couldn’t stand it and sometimes I couldn’t stand her. But if she kissed me, that was all forgotten.

We would see each other in History class sometimes, but she didn’t attend very much. Sometimes I saw her at a party. When I was invited somewhere, I knew Bette Porter would be there since Bette Porter was at every party.
What I didn’t know was if she was going to pretend not to notice me or to take me to a toilet and make out with me.

In the mean while, Alice had told me a lot about the Fiona thing. I just asked Alice randomly what that thing had been and she was so excited she could tell the story again. Shane looked at me with frowned eyebrows, throwing me a ‘you can’t fool me’ look, but she didn’t say anything. I didn’t ask her anything.

One day, Shane stopped me when we crossed each other in the hall of school.

“Listen, Kennard, this is getting stupid. I know you fancy Bette, it’s no crime. Who could blame you? She’s hot as hell.”

“She’s in a relationship and I’m straight.”

“Wrong order.”

“What?”

“You just prooved me right. If you didn’t fancy her, you would point that out first and not the fact she’s taken, if she is.”

“Can we have this conversation somewhere else?”

I took Shanes hand and we sneaked outside, hiding behind a wall. I took her hands firmly in mine and looked into her eyes.

“I am not in love with Bette Porter and I don’t see why you want me to admit such a thing. I don’t feel a thing for her.”

“That’s why you’re so desperate to get through her, to talk to her.”
“I just feel bad for her. Her life isn’t easy, Shane, and she can’t talk to anyone. She told me things nobody else knows.”