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Bette’s Dilemma- Sins of the Past
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"I guess the best place to start is at the beginning. I was in my last year of university and I had finally gotten to the place where I had accepted the fact that I was gay. I’d had a couple of brief relationships with other students but nothing that lasted. I had known for quite a while that I was but I had decided that it was something I definitely did not want my father to know. I went home for Thanksgiving that year although Kit and Daddy were fighting as usual I tried to make the best of it. Then the whole subject was taken completely out of my hands. As we were about to sit down to eat Thanksgiving Day the front door bell rang –Daddy went to see who it was since we were not expecting anyone. The next thing I knew I heard raised voices and my heart sank. I recognized one of them as my most recent ex-girlfriend Trish! She was demanding to see me–I had stupidly told her when we were dating where Daddy lived.
I sat where I was mortified… Kit sat smiling smugly in her seat (happy I guess that she wasn’t the source of embarrassment) as we heard Daddy threatened Trish with the police and the front door closing hard. I can’t tell you T how angry and frustrated I was but also horrified that she had said something to Daddy about our relationship. My greatest fear was confirmed when Daddy came back to the dining room. You know how he could be Tina when he was upset-how he used to wear that robe of self righteousness. Well he turned that cold disapproving look that he had on me and demanded to know if there was any truth in what the ‘tactless young woman’ who had come to our house had said about being my lover. It would have been so easy to deny it T but I just couldn’t. As contradictory as it seems that I was willing to hide who I was from Daddy I just couldn’t deny who I was. Needless to say I didn’t stay for dinner that night and it was months before I saw Daddy again. I left that night and returned to school. Looking back I realize that I took all the hurt and pain from Daddy’s rejection and used it to fuel a self destructive rampage that led me down the path to Monique.
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Wow. That’s heavy. I’m not sure how I feel about that.
WOW leesa excellent as always! what a freakin’ fantastic chapter…. incredible..:)
I strongly suggest you change the rating on this one. It is definitely past PG-13.
You have to follow up quickly w/another post to get this disgusting taste from my mouth. Very powerful.
I will I promise. Not a pleasant chapter but a necessary one, I am afraid. I will change thr rating though thanks
OMG, … and not meant in the typical Tibette way!! Leesa, you seriously had me on the edge of my seat! That chapter explains alot about Bette. You hit a homerun with this one!
Yikes, not what I expected. Difficult to read, so I can only imagine how difficult it was to write. Very griping. I’m curious about Tina’s response and hope she apprectiates Bette’s openess.
This chapter was filled with sadness and evoked the powerful feeling of a woman completely out of control. I truly hope that Tina can stand by Bette and realize that the past is what makes us the people we are today no matter how terrible it might be. Bette truly needs to forgive herself and find a way to move on in a healthy way.
Hello Leesa67, I must say that this latest chapter was so very intense, and for Bette to have to relive such an extremely volatile time in her past is such a strength of character for her. Her personality in the past would have lead her to take the easy way out, to run and hide but here she is bearing her soul to the woman she loves beyond anything. When it comes to Tina I think that she is going to really look at Bette in such a different way, not in the I can’t believe I am with this women, I can’t believe I fell in love with this women, but in the; I thought I new, I thought I realized who Bette is, but here and now I finally realize that after everything that we have been through, the pain we put onto each other, if she was willing to do something so devastating for the women she loved then, something that has scarred her for the rest of her life, what would she be willing to do for me, and more importantly what would she be willing to do for our daughter. I think this is the point in the merging of these two souls where the complete honest from one soul to the other has bonded them more permanently then they might ever have realized. I’m sorry for imposing on you, I would never try to dictate how a writer especially one as gifted as yourself would view there writing, but that is how I see this admission from Bette, the ultimate love for the ones she loves. Sincerely, JC
Such a great update. I can just imagine how hard the choice for Bette was. You’re self image is one of the most important aspects of who we are. It have to give that away for whatever reason is not easy to come back from. Thanks Leesa
Yep, I agree with Tina. She needs time to think about the bombshell Bette just laid on her. Hopefully, they can move past this together. PPS
You are so brave to go there with your story. It was certainly an uncomfortable chapter to read, but it very much explains the source of Bette’s extreme uncertainty about her relationship with Tina. Can’t wait to see Tina’s reaction.
Not only is this hard on Tina but Bette has to relive all of those horrible moments. I hope that Tina will find it in her heart to walk right back into that room and engulf Bette with the strongest hug she can give her. Then whisper in her ear that nothing changes, that she is still deeply in love with Bette.