She recognized the voice as Spencer’s right away. Ashley could tell she was drunk and her voice was shaky. What she heard then broke her more then anything else that had happened all day.

“Ashley, I miss you so much.”

The words echoed through Ashley’s head every moment of every day since Spencer had left the drunken message on her answering machine.

It had been two weeks since the message and she hadn’t seen or heard from the blonde since then. Spencer had called in for emergency personal leave the next day and hadn’t been back since.

This was all her fault. She was a coward. She had to be honest with herself. This wasn’t all her Fathers fault, she could have done something differently. She could have been honest with Spencer and hoped that together they could come up with a plan.

But she was so scared that Spencer would decide she wasn’t worth the hassle that she gave her up without a fight. Now she wished for nothing more then to make it right.

 What if Spencer couldn’t forgive her though? What then? Could she ask Spencer to forgive her, to take her back, to love her again?

Even if Spencer did forgive her that didn’t change the fact that her Father could easily destroy Spencer’s life. So maybe Spencer was better off without her.

Ashley felt schizophrenic with her conflicting feelings towards everything running chaotically through her head. She wanted Spencer that was true, but she was scared of Spencer at the same time.

The only thing that was absolutely certain was that she needed to figure out what she was going to do and she needed to figure it out soon.

*****

Spencer signed in with the reception desk and made her way toward the common area of the rehab hospital. It had been a long time since she had come here alone. Even before there relationship had become more then just friends Ashley had always accompanied her when she came here.

Spencer scanned around the room looking for a puff of blond hair that was similar to her own. She finally spotted Glen sitting on the floor playing with some building blocks. She walked over to him and crouched by his side.