Fan Fiction
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How am I supposed to live without you? part 2
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Suddenly remembering there had been two messages, I felt my body jerk…
Couldn’t I just stop thinking? Couldn’t I just stop feeling? Only untill these messages were done? Why had I agreed to help her?
Oh stop it Tina, don’t be selfish!
Now I was talking to myself again… Great… I really was improving…
I bit my lip, and opened the other message…
Oh my god T… I have never been this nervous in my whole life… My heart is beating wild, my mouth is dry and my knees are weak… Ok maybe I have been feeling like this once in my life… Anyway, seeing these damn cellphones are not allowed in a plane, I better use email… Is it ok for me to send the msgs to your gmail? You are the bomb, T… I wouldn’t know what to do without you! X B
I felt how the air escaped through my slightly parted lips as lightheadedness overtook me… Swaying I grabbed the latticework, quickly placing my forehead against the cold wood…
Why was this so hard for me?
Why couldn’t I distance myself, just a tiny bit longer, what i had been doing for all those months after Angelica was born? The immense dissapointment of not being able to feel anything, of just THINKING, over and over again that I SHOULD be happy, but not FEELING anything? And why now, when I didnt want to, I was so in touch with my emotions?
Every word, every letter causing a sway of my heart… Every thought, every memory that was educed, bringing me excruciating pain…
Pulling myself up, I slowly placed one foot in front of the other, cautiously not to trip or fall I descended the stairs, my head pounding in the rhythm of my heart…
Procrastinating the moment where I’d have to face those emails, I had put my lap-top on the coffeetable, allowing it to get online as I made myself some tea…
Why was it that tea had become such a soothing beverage? Was it that mothers made it to comfort you? Was is that we saw it in the movies? Something bad happened eliciting the words ‘would you like a cup of tea?’? Was it the warmth? Did it even matter?
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Oh! First! :P What friends are for, mom? ;) Brb
Smashing,pps
this is what happens when your a dumbass tina!!!!!!!! dana help her fix this mess!!!!!!! 5 pages!!!!!!!!!! it could be… pms
At first I though that Bette had come back, My the ghost of Dana will get Tina to tell Bette how she feels. Let hope so Hey my young friend you should really make a lot of people happy if you postied real real soon. thanks
I am dying to know what is going to happen next!!! Another post or two would be fantastic… ;-)
WOW!!!! That was Great!!!! I sure hope Dana helps Tina. Thanks I love it!!! PPVS
OMIGOD, first zombies, then i read newdawn’s work, and now ghosts!!!!! AHHHHH! oh, no wait, it’s dana, a friendly ghost. hehe. this was great. really really good. it’s helping me to understand the tibette thing. you’re a fantastic writer!
Wow…this was amazing. You write with such passion and understanding of emotions. I wasn’t expecting Dana and I hope she can help Tina share her feelings. Looking forward to more…can’t wait! Take care!
My comment got lost in cyberspace! What I wrote was the following (or something like it) – you write with such passion and emotion. I wasn’t expecting Dana, let’s hope she can help Tina share her feelings with Bette. Looking forward to more…I’ll be here reading! Take care!
OK..so it wasn’t lost and now I will take my red face and walk away laughing! Take care!
You make it hard, you know that? Tina is suffering so much. You write her feelings tormenting her perfectly. We can feel it. PPS if you can :P
okay…this is really hard to read, it;s like word after word the hope is leaving…and then dna appeared…maybe she will be like on the show, tell tina to go after bette because life is too short to waste on being quiet about your feelings…and i also have a feeling that bette is writing those things to tina, i can’t imagine her feeling so deep for jodi…post soon and bring our girls back together
The tears are coming down because of the heart break that Tina has brought down around her. Does she fight for Bette or does she wait and hope deep in her heart that Bette will come back to her?
Hey JustLoveB+T, Thank you for this intense story. Having Tina recall all of her mistakes and the way that she has helped Bette chase Jodi is soul destroying. To realize what you have destrpyed and cast aside just makes me want to curl up and shut the world out. Tina needs a kick up the ass and I hope that Dana is here to do it. Just like she did with Alice. I really want to see Tina make a play for Bette. Jodi may be her romance right now but I believe that Jodi’s wandering eyes will be the end of that relationship. Having Bette on the receiving end will be an interestiung dynamic. Can’t wait so please post more soon. Many thansk for this awesome adventure. Your Loyal Fan.
this was amazing…can’t wait for the next chappy…pps
“Why was it that every word of her brought out so many memories in me?” , your Tina said… Oh, god, personal memories just invade my mind now, just because I relate so deeply with Tina’s agonizing pain… Memories of an other blond…An other blond, asking for advices her one and only best friend, this so faitfhul and so helpful friend she will always have besides her… “What would I do without you ?”, she said, with this usual warm and grateful light in her eyes… Advices about her last affair, advices about what she should do and how she should react… And, like your Tina here, the faithful and totally devoted friend each time tried her very best to give the most desinterested advice, just to assure the happiness of her one special one – happiness with somebody else. Because true love is so : unselfish, even with unbearable pain in an always wounded heart. Years later, here’s this other blond, finally finding her balance in her family life, surrounded by children and the right person besides her… My one special one, the only one in my heart, for which I will always be ready to give the best desinterested advices all my life along, for the bittersweet joy to remain her best friend and confident…*** Now here’s my plea, dearest M, from the deepest of my Tibette’s heart : please don’t let your Tina suffering this way forever. For she, at least, can have hope to get this happiness again, this miracle some people never knew and/or will never know : a shared true love. I know too well what it is to bear a Jodi in my life and, god, how I need to see how one is able to get again, as deeper as ever, something I will always only have to dream about… Forgive me this ‘attack of melancholy’, my dear talented author, but you have to put the blame on your marvellous writing gift, so full of your beautiful sensitivity, for taking me in such a vivid way on the so bittersweet memory lane. Forever your faithful reader and grateful friend – A.
hey sweety! finally i read it!! if you put cold+ this story = sad very sad night! and morning! i hope you can post soon and bring us some hope… please? when i read at the end Dana… i though maybe is the medicine for the flu htat i am taking that made me read another things but not it’s real Dana wil be there i can’t wait to read how! this story is incredible! hugs
I thought it was Bette… how I wished it was Bette… hehe ;) ‘As long as she’s happy’ but Tina is going to be miserable. How painful it is to want something that you cannot have… especially you’ve had a taste of that wonderful feelings before… maybe Tina ‘helping’ Bette to woo Jodi back is a way to be ‘close’ to Bette again… ‘work along’ to create beautiful things = memories… PPS
Ooooh, Captain, this is so good, but why the heck did you stop there?! I miss Dana, but there she is! Yay! Ok, I need to stop gushing, but this makes me hurt and happy at the same timme, and I’m just waiting for Dana to tell Tina exactly what’s what. Go to it, my friend!
I’m back and had to jump right into 1 aand 2 of this story…great, I am so hooked…and so rooting or Bette and Tina.
tired…I meant ‘for Bette an Tina’
Damn this is so good and hope Dana will help Tina to win Bette back. Ok post soon please, thanks!
WOW – that was so wonderfull – yes do let Dana help Tina. She needs to tell Bette about her true feeling for her. Post soon