Sorrowful goodbyes and Awkward hellos….

I can’t believe the time has gone so quickly and that I have to say goodbye…. I thought that she would just be someone to help me get over Ashley, but she’s been so much more.  She’s been so understanding, comforting and kind, everything I ever wanted and needed in Ashley.  How can you say goodbye to someone who has given you so much and taken so little in return? She never asked me for anything and didn’t expect my love, I think she knew that my heart didn’t belong to me and never would again…. I couldn’t give her what wasn’t mine! My heart will always be Ashley’s, forever…. she just didn’t want it!

“You ok there Spencer?”

“Huh? Oh sorry babe, was a million miles away”

“Back home in L.A?”

“No, just lost in my thoughts is all”

“Still hasn’t got any easier has it?” I can’t believe she can read me so well, and is so understanding about everything….

“You know you can talk to me about it babe, you can talk to me about anything I’ll always be here?”

“I…. I can’t H!!” Spencer ran out the room, trying to stop the tears, to stop the pain tearing away at her heart and soul

She has no idea how much she’s come to mean to me, I know that all I was ever going to be was the rebound relationship but I couldn’t help myself…. Doesn’t she see how amazing she is, how anyone would be lucky to have her in their life?? God, how did life get so complicated, when did it all go so horribly wrong? How could anyone hurt her or let her go? Hannah, Hannah, Hannah…. What have you gotten yourself in to? I’d better go and find her, I know I’m not who she wants but I can’t let her be alone, not when she’s hurting so much….

“Spencer…. where are you?” Hannah called out while she made their way out of their room.  That was the problem with student hostels, so many places to hide and not enough time to look.

She wracked her brains, trying to think of who they knew in the hostel or where Spencer would go.  Would she go to someone’s room? Would she go to the dining area…. No, she’d want to be alone! She thought about the few places there were where you could truly be alone and then it came to her….