Paula said, ‘Before the fire, when I was missing.’ John nodded "Yes" and Paula continued, ‘I was with Franzi.’ John’s mouth dropped lower than a gopher hole. ‘Franzi had stolen from Daniel and lost her job.’

John asked, ‘Franzi stole from Daniel?’

Paula answered, ‘Yes. It was to pay for the cocaine you spilt into the river.’

John felt like it was his fault the fire happened. If he’d helped Emily when he had the chance, she wouldn’t be posing nude, Franzi wouldn’t be stealing, and they wouldn’t be at The Fasan lat at night getting stone drunk.

Paula continued, ‘I tried to find out what Franzi was going to do next before shit got more out of hand. She told me it was none of my business and then…..’

John asked, ‘Then what?’

With her head down, John knelt beside Paula looking up at her face. John repeated, ‘Paula? Then what?’

Getting ready to cry, Paula said, ‘I said she was my business because…..because I love her.’ Then Paula dropped her head again in shame.

John thought she was just feeling guilty like everyone else. He could’ve understood that. Like if he had done something sooner or if Emily had walked away from the cocaine faster, none of this would’ve happened in the first place.

John took Paula’s hands and said, ‘Paula. It’s completely normal for you to feel this way. Franzi was your friend and you’re the one who found her in the fire.’

Paula said, ‘No. No. No! It’s nothing like that. I Love Her.’ Then she had John’s undivided attention. ‘When I told her that I loved her, she didn’t believe me. But I meant it!’

John sat down quiet and let Paula do all the talking. ‘I told her I was not going to lie anymore and that I was going to be together with her. She knew you’d take it hard after everything that’d happened. But WE wanted to be together and I was ready to tell you that. I was afraid but I was ready. The only thing keeping me from opening my mouth was your trouble with Emily. I couldn’t leave you alone to deal with her shit.’

John said, ‘Oh. So you stayed with me out of pity?’

Paula said, ‘No! It was out of fear for you and her. I’m not that heartless! I care about you.’

John replied, ‘And yet you’re the one calling it quits after 5 years of marriage!’

Paula said, ‘I’m not trying to call it quits but I can’t live a lie.’ After that, all was silent.