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    The Girl Who Changed My Life 18: Should we?

    The weeks had passed since Bette and Tina’s engagement. For the first few days it had been like they were living in a fantasy land, but now they were back in reality. Tina worked her normal hours and had put a lot of effort into getting to know Alice better. Alice, incidently, had taken a lot of pride in her involvement in their engagement. Bette, meanwhile, was spending an increasing amount of time at the gallery, and the time that she arrived home at seemed to Tina to be getting later and later every day.

    Tina had given up hope of spending a decent evening with Bette, and had resigned herself to a night in front of the tv. She didn’t even turn round when she heard Bette’s key in the door.

    “Hey T” Bette threw her jacket over the back of the sofa and kissed the top of Tina’s head “I’m starving, you wanna get some take-out?”

    “Bette, it’s 9.30. I already ate” Tina’s eyes never left the tv screen.

    “Baby I’m sorry, I just had some really important stuff going on at the gallery” Bette rifled through the fridge “do we have any pasta?”

    “Try the top shelf” Tina sounded uninterested as she turned off the tv and replaced the background noise with a CD.

    “You okay T?” Bette asked as she gave up on the pasta and started to throw together a salad.

    Tina stood up and turned to face Bette “Does it not bother you that we spend almost no time together at all?”

    “That’s not true” Bette looked up and saw the seriousness in Tina’s eyes “okay, of course I wish I could see you more, but it’s hard with work and everything”

    “You know, I see your ex-girlfriend more than I see you”

    “Well, it’s great that you and Alice are getting on so well” Bette brought her salad to the table and started to eat it.

    “Maybe I should marry her instead then”

    “Don’t be stupid T” Bette said dismissively.

    “Am I being stupid?” Tina raised her voice “this isn’t how newly engaged couples are meant to be, you know. A peck on the cheek in the morning, a ‘how was your day?’ over dinner…if you’re even there…and if I’m lucky, ***** and then bed. I can’t live like this”

    “Well what do you want me to do?” Bette raised her voice to match Tina’s “Quit my job?”

    “Cutting down your eyes might be nice”

    “Tina, living isn’t cheap you know. I can’t afford to work any less”

    “You’re not living, Bette. All you ever do is work. That’s not a life” Tina pointed out.

    “Work is a big part of my life. You’ve always known that”

    “A bigger part than me?”

    “Don’t be ridiculous”

    “Well that’s how it feels” Tina yelled.

    “Well, maybe we just shouldn’t get married!” Bette yelled back.

    There was a pause as the women stared at each other angrily.

    “Maybe we shouldn’t” Tina whispered.

    Tina slid off her engagement ring and placed it on the table in front of Bette, who looked on in disbelief. Without saying another word, Tina turned and walked out of the house.

    “T!” Bette yelled, running after her “don’t do this!”

    “You’re the most important thing in my life, and I thought I was the most important in yours. It seems I was wrong” Tina said coldly as she got into her car.

    “I didn’t mean what I said, I was worked up, I’m sorry” Bette pleaded.

    “You need to figure out your priorities” Tina closed the car door and put key in the ignition.

    “I love you T, don’t go!” Bette yelled as Tina drove away.

    Bette slowly turned and walked back to the house, tears falling down her cheeks.

    “I love you” she whispered.

    She stopped when she closed the door, and the only sound was the music that Tina had put on earlier.

    There’s still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
    There’s still a little bit of you laced with my doubt
    It’s still a little hard to say what’s going on?
    There’s still a little bit of your ghost, your weakness
    There’s still a little bit of your face I haven’t kissed
    You step a little closer each day, yet I can’t say what’s going on?

    Bette started to sob uncontrollably.

    “T…I love you…please don’t go”

    Stones taught me to fly
    Love taught me to lie
    Life taught me to die
    So it’s not hard to fall
    When you float like a cannonball

    Bette sank to her knees against the door and looked upwards. The tears poured down her face as she gripped her head with both hands.

    “I love you”

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