Fan Fiction
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Queer Eye for the Broken Heart
Bette Porter, was sitting in front of her laptop and was trying to send an email to Tina. She desperately hope that Tina Kennard forget the past and fall in love with her again.
After she wrote the letter and saved it as a draft, she called up Alice and asked her to come over. An hour later, Alice came with 2 boxes of Pizza and 2 buckets of KFC chicken.
"Wow you bought a lot of food!" Bette said, helping Alice by taking the food.
"I still can’t believe you asked me to come over for smokes!!! I thought you hate that stuff!" Alice said.
"Things change, eh" Bette said.
"You look vulnerable you know" Alice said.
"It’s been 6 months already. Why haven’t you done anything drastic yet. Like go out on a date, etc. I mean Tina’s moved on already" Alice said, now shutting up. "I’m sorry I didn’t mean to"
"It’s ok. I can’t move on even if I want to. Well smoking marijuana probably would be the first drastic thing I can do right now. Come on, show me the stuff!" Bette said, putting the food on the table and guiding Alice to the poolside.
Once there, Alice took out the roller, rolling paper, pipe and the weed.
"So what do you want the pipe or want to use a joint?" Alice asked
"Um pipe?" Bette replied.
"Good. I was hoping for that! I’ve never used this pipe for like ages!" Alice said as put some weed onto the bowl.
"You take the first hit since this is your first time" Alice said handing her the pipe and the lighter.
Bette lit the pipe and then inhaled it.
"You don’t do it like that! You inhale it while lighting it. Make sure you hold the smoke in you really long. Oh and inhale slowly or else you’ll cough" Alice said.
Bette took the pipe into her mouth, inhaled and lit the lighter above the bowl, the flames burning the weed. Bette inhaled the smoke slowly and coughed, releasing clouds of smoke.
"God you wasted that! That was a good amount of smoke!" Alice said
"God that thing is repugnant! Why do you like that so much! I’d rather smoke a cigarette!" Bette said, watching Alice take a drag.
"Ok now do it again. Inhale as if you’re smoking a cigarette" Alice said. Bette did the same except that she held it in her for as long as 6 seconds and then released it.
"Good, good! Now let’s get stoned" Alice said, taking a drag.
After 30 minutes of smoking weed, the two were so stoned. They started eating all the food Alice bought.
"My God! Did I just ate a bucket of chicken and a box of pizza?" Bette said.
"That’s what happens when you smoke weed"
"I’m still hungry"
"Me too. What do you have?"
The two went back inside and to the kitchen. They found Cream Cheese, Strawberry Jam and couple of bread.
"Wow your fridge is so empty" Alice said, taking the cheese, jam and bread. Bette took the cheese and placed it in the microwave/toaster.
"What are you doing?" Alice asked
"Toasting the cheese?" Bette replied. Alice gave Bette a what-the-***** look.
"Oh *****!" Bette stopped the toaster and saw that the cheese is melted. "Oh well. We just have to make do with what we have" Bette took the knife, took some cheese from the toaster and spreads it on the bread. Then she adds the jam. She rolled it into a ball and stuffed it in her mouth. Alice laughed at Bette.
"What?" Bette asked, with her mouth full.
"You are so weird at handling your high!" Alice said. "Come on let’s go outside and lie down"
When outside, Bette decided to tell Alice.
"You know, I’m writing an email to Tina" Bette said, smoking a cigarette.
"I hope she responds" Alice said.
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I have never smoked, Is it a regular pipe Thats a lot of weed right. You Inhalewhile lighting the pipe and hold the smoke in for as long as you can.m WoW Just gave that up and didn’t even start/ If it make you hungry, I pass.. Alice and Bette are funny. thanks
roflmao great story…but you can’t eat that soon after, it kills your high ;) the longer you wait for the munchies to set in the better the food tastes hehe
Oops, I thought something didn’t sound right, it’s White Castle. Anyways, great start, interesting idea!
LMAO!! Ahahahaaha ahahahahaha this is freaking hilarious! Thanks for teaching me how to smoke….(Not that I do it). This reminds me of the movie “Harold and Kumar Go To Ice Castle,” ahahahahaha
YEAH!! I knew one of these days someone would write about Bette smoking.
It’s about time, haha did she remember to put her finger over the hole on the side?? maybe they should take bong hits
great start looking forward to your next post hahahah its flippen funny as hell to !!! thanx byeness<3387347891358901760