2 months had passed since Tina moved out. Bette and Tina had continued to speak but only a few times in passing. Bette had helped Tina get an apartment of her own so she could get out of Alice’s. After getting Tina settled at her new place, Bette had tried numerous times to have an open discussion with Tina, but Tina still wasn’t ready to talk with Bette so they didn’t. She did, however, begin to slowly let Bette back into her life. They would meet occasionally either at Bette’s house or Tina’s apartment. Mostly because neither of them could function without the other’s company. Their short meetings usually consisted of just sitting and/or watching tv. Tina wouldn’t talk and Bette was too afraid she would be cut off completely if she tried to persuade Tina otherwise. The new symbiotic relationship they were forging was pathetic. They were clinging to one another because they had no one else, nor did they want anyone else, but both were hesitant to move forward. Bette was going stir crazy. It was difficult for her to leave things alone, unsure of what was happening between them, knowing it was unhealthy, but not willing to give up what she had left. If nothing more she had Tina’s company. They weren’t friends, they weren’t lovers, they weren’t partners, ***** they weren’t really even exes….they just were. They were caught in the space between. The space between what? Bette often wondered. She guessed this was purgatory. At times this was a far worse punishment than competely losing Tina. Bette loved knowing she could see Tina whenever she wanted, but it was like walking into an antique store…she couldn’t touch. Tina was off-limits, emotionally, physically, and most other ways. What a love that you would endure this ***** just to share the same air of that one person. Bette knew it was fucked-up and twisted…she knew it had to stop. She picked her moment and made her final attempt to break the ice.

Bette: “Tina….I know you would just rather sit here and not be reminded of my existence, but I can’t take this anymore. If you don’t want to talk at least listen.”

Tina didn’t move or speak. She didn’t even blink, but Bette knew she had no choice but to hear what Bette had to say. Bette took a deep breath and continued, “First of all, I’m sorry. I know that doesn’t mean anything to you…you probably don’t even believe it, but it’s true. I can’t change what I’ve done. I know that, but I can change me. We can fix us. I know you don’t have lot of faith in me and probably less trust in me, but I will prove my worthiness of you. I will make myself worthy of you…I know I wasn’t in the past. If you need time away….no matter how long…..I will remain yours. I will stand idly by and wait an eternity for your forgiveness if that’s what you need from me. You are the only one for me. Unfortuantely it took losing you to see it, but I can promise you, I’ll never lose sight of you again.” Bette stood to leave, still unsure if her words had any effect on Tina until she saw a single tear cascade down Tina’s cheek. Bette walked towards Tina and kneeled in front her, taking Tina’s hand in her own and forcing Tina to look at her. Bette leaned in and gently placed a kiss on Tina’s lips….Tina did not deny her. Tears streamed from both of their eyes as Bette leaned back to wipe Tina’s away.

Bette: “I’ll always hold a place for you in my heart. I love you.” She released Tina’s hand leaving a peice of folded stationary in it. Tina looked oddly at the paper as she read the words “To Tina, my love…my life” that were scribbled on the outside flap. Now understanding what Tina needed from her, Bette turned quietly and walked out of her life.

TBC?? (Below is my inspration for this story and what Bette had written in the note.)

The Promise

If you wait for me then I’ll come for you
Although I’ve traveled far
I always hold a place for you in my heart
If you think of me, if you miss me once in awhile
Then I’ll return to you
I’ll return and fill that space in your heart

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I’ll find my way back to you
If you’ll be waiting
If you dream of me like I dream of you
In a place that’s warm and dark
In a place where I can feel the beating of your heart

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I’ll find my way back to you
If you’ll be waiting
I’ve longed for you and I have desired
To see your face your smile
To be with you wherever you are

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I’ll find my way back to you
If you’ll be waiting
I’ve longed for you and I have desired
To see your face, your smile
To be with you wherever you are

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I’ll find my way back to you
Please say you’ll be waiting

Together again
It would feel so good to be
In your arms
Where all my journeys end
If you can make a promise if it’s one that you can keep, I vow to come for you
If you wait for me and say you’ll hold
A place for me in your heart.