Chapter 26

***Angelica***

“*****, *****, *****, as if I’m not in enough trouble already.” I scolded myself as I saw that it was almost one in the morning. I was formulating apologies in my mind for mom, for Gina and for Becky, mostly mom because I hate that I hurt her like that. I didn’t mean it, but I said it and now the damage was done. I was just mad at them I guess for not taking my side. They always take my side, but then again I have never done something like this before. I am ***** with people’s feelings for selfish reasons, just to satisfy my sexual urges. I used Becky for *****. It doesn’t matter whether or not I told her that I was involved with someone, we should never have crossed that line. I have been talking with Gina, still professing my love for her. Which isn’t a lie. I do love her. I still think about her as my girlfriend. And even though I am still young, in my heart I know that we belong together. But I went outside the relationship. Although my heart belongs to her, my body has been with someone else. And there is no excuse or justification for betraying her like that. Mom. I took the worse experience in her life, something she wanted to forget, something she still feels guilty about, something private that she trusted me with, and threw it back in her face.

I fell asleep at some point and now my parents will be even more pissed. I rode home as quickly as I could. I regret not taking the car now. It was a little after two when I got home. I was hoping that they would be so angry that they wouldn’t care and not wait up for me. No such luck. The kitchen light was on.

“Where the ***** have you been?” Bette asked angrily as I walked through the door. “Do you know what time it is?”

“I lost track of time, I’m sorry.”

“You lost track of time?” She paused. “You are to go to school and back. No soccer, no debate club, nothing. No computer, no phone and no tv for the next month. If you’re going to act like a child you’re going to be treated as such.”