Helena: So did you sleep well?

Tina: It was alright.

Helena: Thanks for agreeing to meet me for breakfast Tina. It gets lonely here sometimes in New York.

Tina: Really?

Helena: Yes Dont you believe me?

Tina: Well, its hard to believe considering you know

Helena: Considering?

Tina: I mean you dont really strike me as someone who finds it hard to.

Helena: No. Thats not the point. Its easy to find someone but to have a meaningful conversation with? Now, thats rare. Im glad youre here in New York.

I smiled and ordered my meal.

Helena: So whats your plan for the day Tina?

Tina: I dont know. I thought Id go over the proposal again just to make sure I get everything right.

Helena: Oh thats not fun at all.

Tina: No but it has to be done.

Helena: Why dont we go out tomorrow?

Tina: Tomorrow?

Helena: Yes. After a long hard day at work, we should do something fun. Im taking Wilson and Jun Ying out. Im sure theyd love to see you.

Tina: I dont know. What about Winnie?

Helena: What about her?

Tina: Is this your weekend with them? Cos if it is, I dont want to intrude.

Helena: You wont be intruding. So come ok? Well pick you up.

Jun Ying and Wilson, I missed them both. The time Ive spent with them was the most cherished memories I have with Helena. I love them as if they were my own. Jun Ying loves drawing and when it was Helenas turn to have them, she always takes Jun Ying around the CAC to look at some art. And Wilson? Hes grown to be the handsome prince. Always looking after Jun Ying. Thinking about those two made my heart swell with pride. I nodded not really believing I will see them again. Helena smiled.

Helena: And about that proposal guess what?

Helena looks amazingly beautiful in her childlike grin I couldnt help but smile.

Tina: What?

Helena: I talked to my secretary last night. She was talking to me about the meeting next week.

Tina: Why? Did you have to reschedule?

Helena: No. Not at all. She was just informing me of my schedule for next week Anyway If you want to know Ive read your proposal.

Tina: You have?

I dont believe it.

Helena: Yes I have.

Tina: But when? You didnt even know about the meeting when I asked you last night.

Helenas smile widened.

Helena: If you must know, I asked my secretary to bring it over this morning. When you told me the reason you were here in New York, I immediately called my secretary. And I had some time to review it. And I must say Tina, if you were to work in big corporations, youd be their star! You have the ability to provoke feelings and convince people in your proposals in a way that no one else can. How do you do that?

Tina: Ummm well, I just write how things are.

Helena: Well, I must say I became very emotional. I think its the best youve ever written.

Tina: Thank you Helena. Thats very kind of you.

Helena: You havent seen anything kind yet!!!

Tina: What do you mean?

Helena: Lets just say that Oscar would be happy

Tina: Oh my god! Are you saying that… but dont you have to bring it up to the Board for approval?

Helena: Tina, I am the chairperson. Ultimately I will decide who gets what and how much. So please dont argue with me

Tina: Im not arguing Im just wow. Thank you

Helena: Ill have some papers sent to Oscar by Monday. My people are writing up the necessary documents as we speak.

Tina: I, I I dont know what to say. I actually have presentation slides prepared for when we were supposed to have the meeting but I guessI, Helena thank you.

Helena: Dont worry about it. I just thought maybe we can do something else then.

Tina: Im sorry?

Helena: Since were not going to have that presentation youve prepared for me, we should go out and do something. Catch up on things ok? The meeting is on Thursday, right?

Tina: Yes it is. I dont know. I was just thinking that I might just fly back to LA since youve given some thoughts about the project.

Helena: When do you plan on going back?

Tina: I dont know, maybe Monday?

Helena: Oh. But you havent booked your flight yet have you? So you can stay longer?

Tina: I planned on flying back on Friday but

Helena: Its settled. No need to fly home on Monday. Stay here a while longer.

Tina: I dont know. Usually I go back to report to Oscar of the meeting once it is over. I dont know if its such a good idea for me to stay

Helena: Youre doing HIM a favour by staying here Tina. Look at it this way. While youre here, you can actually work with me on the grant. So if we have any questions, we need not look far. Youd be here when we need you.

Tina: I dont know.

Helena: Well, Ill talk to Oscar about this. So you can stay here longer.

Tina: I still dont feel

Helena: Look. All I ask is for a few days Tina. I promise you itll be work well mostly work. All work and no play makes Tina a dull girl

I laughed at this. Since we watched The Shining, Helena had used that line to make me stop working. It was a few months into the relationship and I really didnt feel like going out. So I suggested we rent a movie. Helena wasnt a big fan of staying home but didnt want to go out to get the movie so she had asked her driver to get one for us. And of all the films he couldve picked, he chose The Shining! So we just watched it and stayed through the whole gory bits and pieces. She thought the statement was funny.

Tina: Ok but Ill talk to Oscar. You dont need to.

Helena: Good. You know Im really glad youre here

The rest of breakfast was nice. Helena stayed true to her words, even this morning we talked about nothing but work. How excited she is about spending another year helping our community. It turned out she, not only will be giving grants, she will also be interested in getting involved and making appearances in any activities that we will be organising. I thought that was such a good idea and she was beaming as I said so.

Tina: Oh my. Ive held you for almost all morning now. I think I better head back to the hotel.

Helena looked rather disappointed at this but looked at her watch nonetheless.

Helena: Well, its only 1030am. We still have the rest of the day.

Tina: Do you not have anyplace you need to be?

Helena: Nothing important.

Tina: What about, Jun Ying and Wilson?

Helena: Do you want to meet them today?

Tina: You know I love them. But Ill just meet them tomorrow. For now I think I just need some time on my own to clear my head.

Helena: Is there anything wrong Tina? (Helena reached for my hand and as she did, held it tight and stared at me with concern)

Tina: Oh, nothing is wrong. (I slid my hand from her grip and just smiled uncomfortably)

Helena: Oh ok. Ill just drop you off at your hotel and well meet up tomorrow ok?

Tina: Oh no dont worry about it Helena. Im just going to need a walk.

Helena: Well ok.

Helena nodded at the waitress for the bill. I offered to pay but she refused, saying it was her idea to have this breakfast; she just thanked me for the good company.

Tina: Thank you for the breakfast.

Helena: No problem. Again thanks for the company; Ive really enjoyed breakfast Tina. Ill see you tomorrow ok?

I watched Helena as she got into her car and sped off. Sigh! I took my cell phone out of my bag and dialled Oscars.

Oscar: Tina?

Tina: Hey Oscar. Youd never believe it

Oscar: What is it?

Tina: Helena agreed. She said she liked our proposal. And she will have the papers sent to you by Monday! Isnt it great?

Oscar: Oh my god! That is great! I knew I didnt send you to New York for nothing, Thank you Tina.

Tina: Hey, anything for the community. Anyway, she needed me here for a few days would that be ok?

Oscar: But I thought you wont be coming in until next week?

Tina: Yeah but I didnt need to present anything to her. She just read the proposal this morning and she made her decision on the spot. But she said she needed me here to discuss some things. Would that be ok?

Oscar: Ok? Thats more than ok Tina. I mean, its much easier for them to get the information on the work we do here if youre there. So take as much time as you need ok? Just keep me posted.

Tina: Ok. Thanks Oscar. Im going to go now.

Oscar: Hey thank you! Everyones going to be ecstatic when they find out! Take care!

I hung up and felt relieved about all this. Wow! I got our proposal approved. And I get to relax the rest of the day not having to worry about the presentation. So Ill be staying here in New York longer than I thought Helena said wed do something else then. Hmmm I still dont know if I like the sound of that. Maybe I can get my way round it.

I let out a huge air and sighed. What is that? What is wrong with me? Surely I should be happy about this. I mean, we went from no grants to getting a very resourceful institution who is still interested in helping out. But why do I feel uneasy about all this? Is it because of Helena? Is it because of the fact that I will once again be working with her? That I will be spending time with her? Ive been working with her for the last three years and most of that time we were a couple. Surely this wont cause any problems No, thats not it. Thats not the reason.

I walked around with a million things on my mind but one that stands out the most; Bette. What are you doing with her Bette? What are you doing with Melanie? Did you invite me to the opening so I could see you with her? No, you couldnt have planned for that. Did you really want to see me Bette? Did you really want me to come? Because I did. And I saw you with Melanie. She kissed you and you looked happy. And thats all I want, for you to be happy. But I know Bette, I know that YOU would be happier with me. I know I can make you happy. I couldve made you smile when you left last night. And if I was your lover Bette, I would never let you leave with the visible pain. I wouldve had you smiling and laughing next to me. We would drive home together. I know it. We just have to work for it. We just have to try once more.

But why did I run? Why did I run from you? I could see the hurt in your eyes how lost you were. I shouldve just walked up to you and talked to you. Maybe I couldve made things better for you, made YOU feel better.

As I walked around looking around but not actually seeing, I thought of a plan. I still have a few days left in New York. I should make the best of it. I smiled, took my cell out and pressed redial.