The air was smothering, full of hate, sadness, confusion, hurt, and love.  I was drowning in the scent of you, of us together.  Our perfumes mixed with the smell of lust suffocating.  The heat from our tangled bodies caused us to sweat keeping our bare skin suctioned together, our backs swollen and cracked by the dragging of nails.  My fingers were numb, from the rubbing, thrusting, and tracing of you, my tongue aching after the exploration of you.

You came by to tell me you had sex with Aiden for the first time, and on hearing those words I lost all control I once had around you.  You looked at me tears building in my eyes, already pouring from yours.  With ease I lay you down and straddle your waist, I lay my head on your chest and cry, feeling you shake under me.  On looking up I see shock and confusion, but also want.  I level my face with yours and use one hand to stable myself while the other pushes a stray hair behind your ear.  Cupping your face our lips meet, I can taste the cherry kool-aid on your breath as I get lost in your euphoria.  I feel your hands pulling me deeper as our tongues collide and I feel you rise as to help me remove your top.  With out hesitation you then pull mine off, I sit there on your lap and let you just look soaking it in.  I can see the mark on your neck that I left last night; I reach out to touch it.  I lean in and kiss it hearing a small whimper escape your lips, I pull back and you envelope me into a passion filled kiss breaking it only to look deep into my tear filled eyes and say “I love you.”

 We lie here in my bed completely spent, except a few stray tears that unknowingly escape.  You did love me, was all I thought about.  I reach to stroke your arm but you shrug it off as though it burned.  “I’m with Aiden.” You say getting up pulling your clothes back on.  At this I didn’t know what to think.  I got a little panicked.

 “Spence, what just happened?  Are you seriously going to just run away and pretend this,” I waved my hand gesturing between us “didn’t go on?” I asked now on the verge of tears again, too much today.  Getting out of bed I walk over to you and turn you to face me, a look in your eyes I’ve never seen before.