I smile as Chance reaches over his stall door and tries to steal my breakfast.  I take one more bite and give him the rest of my apple.  He thanks me by gently nudging my shoulder. I would swear he knows I had a rough night.  He has soft eyes and if he could I think he would give me a hug. 

I give him a pat on the neck and head up the stairs to the hay loft to toss down some alfalfa bales for my mom.  I come back down to help throw hay to all the horses that are now nickering in anticipation of breakfast.

“Good heavens, Spencer.” My mom says with a laugh. “You are covered in hay.  You look like when I caught you sneaking that girl out of the loft.”

“Rude, mom!” I said in a mock hurt voice. “I was hoping you had forgot about that!”  It was kind of funny now, but not so much at the time.  If Trish hadn’t been making so much noise and spooking the horses below my mom wouldn’t have found out.  I got a HUGE lecture from the parents and a high five from Glen.  Since La Grande had a small college there was no shortage of straight girls that wanted to “see what it was like”.  None of them were ever really gay or ‘in it to win it’ I like to say.

“I need to get going before you bring up more embarrassing moments.” I say.

“Lord knows, you have plenty of them for me to remind you about!” my mom laughs. 

We head out of the barn and Chance nickers a good-bye.  What a sweet boy.  I will miss home this year.

I get back to the house to find that Glen has washed my truck and finished loading the rest of my stuff.

“Thanks Glen!”

“No problem sis, I figured you wanted to look good for the ladies when you roll into town. Bauw-Chikka-Bau-Bau!” 

"Oh my God, Glen that is too far!”  He has made me laugh though and it is just what I needed.  “I am gonna miss you bro.  You have to come see me more this year, and bring Mads down with you.

“Sounds like a plan, sis.  Seriously, we would love to come see you….and Ashley?” he says with a smirk digging for more info.

“There is no Ashley bro.  I just had this dream the other night and it seemed so real and she was amazing and I was happy and I don’t know what to think…”

“Whoa, whoa easy there.” Glen says stopping my rambling.  He knows what I am thinking about my premonitions.  “Don’t worry Spencer.  Just take it day by day.   You can’t waist time thinking about one person if you don’t even know if they are real or not.  If it is meant to be it will be.”  Jeeze, when did my younger brother get so much more grown up than me?

I talk to Clay.  I get through my good-byes and finally get my self on the road to Gram’s house. 

It is a long drive.  God bless lots of caffeine and my iPod loaded with songs.  I have a wide variety when it comes to music.  I sing along for half of the trip till I realize that I am loosing my voice and it is starting to sound like I have been smoking 3 packs a day.  Sexy.  So I spend the rest of the time letting images of a dark haired beauty flip through my mind.