Don’t fix your eyes on a fix you rely on.

Fixed her eyes on a fix…

“It doesn’t matter. I fucked it all up anyway,” I could never figure out why everyone draws conclusions based on their tunnel vision view of life.  They’re too afraid of rejection to go after what they really want.  But right then she was in no shape to go chasing lost loves, or even chasing lost marbles.  Not that I could make her do what she needed to do; get clean.  She had to make that choice.

When life starts to burn and the pain returns.

I just wish that I could heal the hurt you feel tonight.

There’s life in your veins. These needles are chains to hold you down.

How can you expect to win this war if you’re too afraid to fight?

“It does matter.  For now though, you need to sober up.  If you ever want your life, and your girl, back,” she scoffed and rolled over.  Try as she might, I could see through her fake strength to the scared core of her being.

Stand unafraid.

All the good souls stand unafraid.

Stand unafraid, all the good souls stand unafraid.

A month, several heartfelt talks, fights, and nights spent holding her shaking hands later and she was doing extremely well.  Better than I expected.  She had stopped avoiding the truth and would discuss with me the joys experienced with her father or the bitter fights with her mother.  Mostly she stayed away from the subject of Spencer, the hurt still too new and the guilt burning with icy embers in her heart.  Even despite her progress I was surprised when she suggested going back to LA and I saw a steely determination in her eyes.

When life starts to burn and the pain returns.

I just wish that I could heal the hurt you feel tonight.

There’s life in your veins. These needles are chains to hold you down.

How can you expect to win this war if you’re too afraid to fight?

It took her nearly three weeks to build up the courage to even step foot on the pier.  Four more days to call Spencer, no time at all to let all the insecurities delve back in.  but by then I could not interfere, this was her fight.  So I’ll admit that my commentary was a bit out of place with Spencer at the club.  It just always frustrated me to no end when people fought the inevitable like she had been.  And of course, in an attempt to stay out of the situation as much as possible, I tried to stop Anina from dedicating the song to them.  But, she’s a meddler and did it anyway.