”Yeah.. yeah I think I do, D.” I softly say with my beer bottle leaning on the lips, hearing my voice echoing inside the curved green walls of glass.

A sighing “good” finishes a conversation that could’ve been about all the dreams we never followed.

All those shooting stars we left behind that could’ve taken us away from here. All those thoughts, hopes and rainbows on the other side of the ocean that we constantly hope can give us the release we’ve looked for so long.

All those places we never talk about but always think of.

With a heavy “good” that only unloads yet another weight onto this worn-out but far too familiar pier, I feel how it takes another diving step into the water below us. A step closer to a bottomless hole we try to stay away from every passing day. How it has descended throughout the years we’ve spent sitting here and unburdened sigh after sigh and how it still repeatedly tries to suck us dry from troubles.

How it has taken all the things we’ve suffered from and merely rebuilt the bridges we frequently managed to burn.

But with eyes that holds nothing but emptiness I fear that if I don’t throw him a rope to pull him in with he might never come back. If I don’t haul him onto land at once he might get stuck somewhere between all that he dreams of and all that he needs. The puzzle pieces that always refuses to compromise.

So I’m tossing him a rope with fingers crossed so hard I fear that I might be loosing him within this force of mine. I’m giving it a poor shot, trying to pull him closer with the weakest words I’ve ever come up with but that will hopefully bring him back from those darkened worlds. Bring him back and share places beyond obligations and impossibilities. Places where he can create the surroundings himself. Places where he can live for the sake of living instead of barely surviving.