In Palestine, she started looking for him, I rather wished she wouldn’t find him and give up, but she didn’t, she kept looking till I joined her, and we found him, hiding somewhere nobody ever suspected he would be there, we found him staying in the dead sea (lowest place on earth). I took that as an excuse not to follow her there, but promised to wait for her in the high Galilee (north), and she promised to be back soon. I waited, but in vain, till I couldn’t wait more, at one point I thought she might have been in danger, so I decided to follow her despite everything. Suddenly before I left I received a letter from her, she apologized and said she loved me, but she couldn’t leave him, and wanted to stay with him. Though I was relived she wasn’t in danger, I have to confess I wasn’t satisfied. So I went back to the states, leaving her in his arms.

After 3 months, I received a letter from William himself begging me to come back to England to look after her. he remained as mysterious as always, but his request was obvious, he begged me to make her forget him, promising he would never come back.

I never intended to go back, but I thought his request meant something, so to England was my destination. I found her in his house, you could never imagined how she looked like, she looked like a ghost to me; she kept crying, weeping, sobbing, and making the best of misery, she frightened me, I tried making it easier for her, I calmed her down, but all in vain, she kept saying “I saw his death!… he’s dead!” I tried whatever I could. And it was all over when she slept, in my arms, where she never woke up.

You could never imagine how I felt and how I looked like when it was all over. I was there when she died and I couldn’t do anything about it. And for the first time in my life I felt the real pain.

I was mad, mostly with my self, first I let her go, and it was all for my pride, I left her to end up with another man, I was pretending to be the hero, who was never meant to be the hero. I shouldn’t have left her, I should have kept her with me, and I shouldn’t have agreed to take her there. But what was the use of all. She was dead, dead in my arms.