Spencer: “Yeah a little.”

Ashley: “What do you want; your wish is my command.”  Spencer loved when Ashley was this attentive it made her feel love, not she ever doubted Ashley’s love for her.   She thought for a while before answering.

Spencer: “ok I want bacon and eggs sunny side up, white toast, chocolate milk and a grapefruit.”

Ashley: “Grapefruit? But Spence you hate grapefruit.”

Spencer: “I know, but ever since I became pregnant I have carving them.”  Ashley at her girlfriend and gave her a gentle kiss; before going downstairs to make Spencer breakfast; an hour later the girl finish breakfast and where now back lying on Ashley’s bed.  Ashley was on her back and Spencer had her head rested on Ashley’s chest while Ashley ran her hand up and down Spencer’s back.  Ashley wanted to know what Spencer was going to do about the baby, but she didn’t know how to ask.  What if Spencer got mad with her because she wanted to know or tell her it was none of her business or even worst tells her to stay out of her life. Ashley continued to have a mental battle when she just decided to ask Spencer.

Ashley: “Spence” Ashley said which caused her girlfriend to look up at her.

Spencer: “Yeah babe.”

Ashley: “Can I ask you something and you won’t get mad” Spencer looked at her confused.

Spencer: “Ash you can ask me anything; nothing can make me mad at you.”

Ashley: “Ok um what are you going to do?  I mean about the baby.”  Spencer looked down and sighed.  “It ok, Spence I should have.”

Spencer: “No Ash it’s not that, it’s just I don’t know what to do.”  She said sitting up Ashley followed her suit and the two sat on Ashley’s bed face to face as they continue to talk.  “I am differently not having an abortion that’s out of question.” Ashley sighed and thought “thank God”, Spencer then continued. “I thought of adoption, but then thought how could spend the rest of my life knowing that I gave my own flesh and blood to complete stranger and always wondering if I made the right choice and if he or she was ok or somewhere out there hating me because I gave them up.”  Spencer paused and then continued.  “I thought about keeping it, raise him or her, but then I realize how big of responsibility that be for me.  I mean how can I raise this child on my own and I just in high, I would have to give up all my dream of going to college and everything else that was supposed to happen.  Most importantly I don’t know if I am ready to be a mother; I don’t think I know how to be one” Spencer said almost in tears.  Ashley took her girlfriend’s hand in her own and with the free hand wipes Spencer’s tears that were falling.