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28 Days – (Chapter: a heart that’s full of black.)
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Spencer lurched off the bed, startling Ashley as she leapt. She made it to the wastepaper basket by the desk and then threw up. Thankfully there was a plastic bag in the basket. For seconds Ashley watched her empty her stomach into the bag and then walked over, kneeling down beside her and gently pulling the blonde locks back, out of the way.
It took some time for Spencer to stop retching. Ashley led her back to the bed and sat her down. Then she cleaned out the waste paper basket before it smelt the room out. Besides, she needed to be away for Spencer for at least two minutes to try and get her chaotic thoughts in some kind of order.
She threw out the tied off bag with a wrinkled nose and then threw the bin in the laundry for the maid to clean tomorrow. She thought for a minute and grabbed a bucket on her way out, who knew if Spencer would chuck again.
‘Ew. Won’t that be fun’ Sometimes she agreed with her head. Rarely, but sometimes.
What did she want? Did she want Spencer, because something told her that if she played her cards just right that wouldn’t be a problem. But Spencer wasn’t exactly right for her at the moment.
‘Have you actually grown a backbone? Found some self worth? Took you long enough!’ Was it just Ashley or did the voice in her head just snort derisively.
Shaking her head, and still no clearer, Ashley took the bucket upstairs.
Spencer was lying on her side on the bed, staring out into space limply. She didn’t move and her eyes didn’t flicker when Ashley came in. The brunette put the bucket on the floor on the blonde’s side of the bed, then put herself on the other side of the bed. She sat cautiously, not touching the blonde and not speaking.
They sat like that, Spencer staring off into the distance and Ashley examining her hands, memorizing each line and twist.
“What do I do now?” the whisper from Spencer caught Ashley’s ear and she maintained the silence, not knowing how to answer. “I’m a whore.”
“Spencer, don’t say that.”
“I am. That’s what I’m doing. I’m whoring myself to make my family happy.” Spencer rolled over and looked at Ashley. “I hurt you, I hurt myself, I’m going to hurt Aiden, and what for? Nothing. To make a convincing lie for my family. What sort of person does that make me Ashley?”
The brunette thought about that one for awhile, and then answered very carefully. “A desperate one.”
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woohoo! First to comment so this will have to be speedy – loved the update although thats now twice in a row you’ve had people hurling in your fic – not particularly pleasant but not too much of a deterrent so alls good! I keep finding myself craving more of your fics so please update this one again soon or the other one. I’ll give you presents with varying degrees of value….pretty please?!
bugger it, not first. I’ll just hope and pray for next time!
OH MY…wow..that was…beautiful. Spencer defines sheer desperation and i adore how even though Ashley is going through such intense emotional turmoil, she puts her needs aside for spencer. Love this fic sooo much, i can’t even express it in words
“DAMN YOU GOOD LOOKING CALIFORNIAN WENCH!! DAMN YOUI do own your soul now :D” I will take all of that as a compliment, Miss Sarah, lol.Yay for update!!!! Figured the current state of events, but very interested in how you will handle all of this. You are so great at twisting and expunging the various layers of complexity that live within what we do many times consider to be simplistic events/actions/emotions. Did that make sense? I just ate eggs…now I feel wierd. Thank you m’dear, and now I hope to see Ash and Spence gaining some backbone and assessing how important honesty is in any type of relationship. And yes, the words you gave Ash in response to spencer’s query were perfect: “A desperate one.” Yes, indeed, she is.you rock. But, I think you already knew that. xxo
Hmmm. I agree. Spencer and Ashley are definitely not right for each other….yet. Of course we all know they’re perfect for each other in the long run, but now? Holy Jesus, no. They need to reestablish the want and need and trust and comfort they once had in each other. And that may take a long time. Once again, poor Aiden. Dude’s getting the shitty end here.
ack. i think i may be sick myself. teenagers are already so screwed up, why do parents have to make it worse! (shoot me if i ever do that.) ashley did nail it with ‘desperate’. wonderful job of making spencer someone we can care about after her ‘mistake’ so to speak. i feel so badly for both of them. so much pain…
oh yeah – pegleg: if you somehow with your amazing powers made this update happen, you rock, because this update rocked. it was very palpable and beautiful, clom. pats on the back for all.
ok dont girls usually “whore” themselves aroud to piss their families off? i know i let them “think” i was whoring around to piss them off. lil did they know i was never really into them strapping little jerk faces. It was their sisters my mammy should have been worried about. ha ha too bad ashley doesnt have a brother.
damn this is great! I mean maybe before ashley comforts spencer anymore, she ought to go wash her hands. oh hell spence has got aidenators all over too so they ought both discuss their future it in the shower… After they brush their teeth! Ewe. stomache acid >_
thank you for this! incredible. especially for their first time staying with each other and trying to talk. i was so nervous when ashley started to freak out about spence’s dirty secret, but it’s not like she shouldn’t have expected it. the worst blow was when aiden said they were dating, and ash dealt with it… she’s such a strong character in this, i love her.
Holy FuDamn! That was so intense. I’m still reeling from the intensity. Yowza. You are freaking amazing. Update soon because even though Spencer and Ashley are sorta on speaking terms right now I need to know what happens. I need every exact detail, down to their last thought. Every single tiny thought. I swear, you are so stinking amazin’. Whoa…dude. My awe for you just like – tripled. Wow! Love.
woohoo! First to comment so this will have to be speedy – loved the update although thats now twice in a row you’ve had people hurling in your fic – not particularly pleasant but not too much of a deterrent so alls good! I keep finding myself craving more of your fics so please update this one again soon or the other one. I’ll give you presents with varying degrees of value….pretty please?!
bugger it, not first. I’ll just hope and pray for next time!
OH MY…wow..that was…beautiful. Spencer defines sheer desperation and i adore how even though Ashley is going through such intense emotional turmoil, she puts her needs aside for spencer. Love this fic sooo much, i can’t even express it in words
“DAMN YOU GOOD LOOKING CALIFORNIAN WENCH!! DAMN YOUI do own your soul now :D” I will take all of that as a compliment, Miss Sarah, lol.Yay for update!!!! Figured the current state of events, but very interested in how you will handle all of this. You are so great at twisting and expunging the various layers of complexity that live within what we do many times consider to be simplistic events/actions/emotions. Did that make sense? I just ate eggs…now I feel wierd. Thank you m’dear, and now I hope to see Ash and Spence gaining some backbone and assessing how important honesty is in any type of relationship. And yes, the words you gave Ash in response to spencer’s query were perfect: “A desperate one.” Yes, indeed, she is.you rock. But, I think you already knew that. xxo
Hmmm. I agree. Spencer and Ashley are definitely not right for each other….yet. Of course we all know they’re perfect for each other in the long run, but now? Holy Jesus, no. They need to reestablish the want and need and trust and comfort they once had in each other. And that may take a long time. Once again, poor Aiden. Dude’s getting the shitty end here.
ack. i think i may be sick myself. teenagers are already so screwed up, why do parents have to make it worse! (shoot me if i ever do that.) ashley did nail it with ‘desperate’. wonderful job of making spencer someone we can care about after her ‘mistake’ so to speak. i feel so badly for both of them. so much pain…
oh yeah – pegleg: if you somehow with your amazing powers made this update happen, you rock, because this update rocked. it was very palpable and beautiful, clom. pats on the back for all.
ok dont girls usually “whore” themselves aroud to piss their families off? i know i let them “think” i was whoring around to piss them off. lil did they know i was never really into them strapping little jerk faces. It was their sisters my mammy should have been worried about. ha ha too bad ashley doesnt have a brother.
damn this is great! I mean maybe before ashley comforts spencer anymore, she ought to go wash her hands. oh hell spence has got aidenators all over too so they ought both discuss their future it in the shower… After they brush their teeth! Ewe. stomache acid >_
thank you for this! incredible. especially for their first time staying with each other and trying to talk. i was so nervous when ashley started to freak out about spence’s dirty secret, but it’s not like she shouldn’t have expected it. the worst blow was when aiden said they were dating, and ash dealt with it… she’s such a strong character in this, i love her.
Holy FuDamn! That was so intense. I’m still reeling from the intensity. Yowza. You are freaking amazing. Update soon because even though Spencer and Ashley are sorta on speaking terms right now I need to know what happens. I need every exact detail, down to their last thought. Every single tiny thought. I swear, you are so stinking amazin’. Whoa…dude. My awe for you just like – tripled. Wow! Love.
Wow poor spencer and ashley! i hope they can figue things out! Update soon!
more now Clom, you know the drill ;-) Loving it, and like how Ash seems to have found her brain again – she got over the alcohol very quickly! Spencer needs to get over herself, I mean gees, she’s gay, it’s not like it’s the end of the world – if she loved Ash that much she wouldn’t care about her parents, and she certainly wouldn’t have slept with Aiden… idiot! ah well, I would shake her and slap her upside the head to try to make her see sense, but seeing as I don’t hit people, and this Spencer has no actual touchable form, I’ll just make do with cajoling you into writing more damn soon ;-) love! Jx
Wow poor spencer and ashley! i hope they can figue things out! Update soon!
more now Clom, you know the drill ;-) Loving it, and like how Ash seems to have found her brain again – she got over the alcohol very quickly! Spencer needs to get over herself, I mean gees, she’s gay, it’s not like it’s the end of the world – if she loved Ash that much she wouldn’t care about her parents, and she certainly wouldn’t have slept with Aiden… idiot! ah well, I would shake her and slap her upside the head to try to make her see sense, but seeing as I don’t hit people, and this Spencer has no actual touchable form, I’ll just make do with cajoling you into writing more damn soon ;-) love! Jx
oh my freakin god!! that was a heaven sent update! ash is such a wuss when it comes to spencer. ;) but we wouldnt want it any other way do we? i agree with goober, they are so not right for each other now. ash has to be the friend now, not lover. and help spence figure out her life before it gets worse. I LUG YOU SO MUCH for this update!!!!
oh my freakin god!! that was a heaven sent update! ash is such a wuss when it comes to spencer. ;) but we wouldnt want it any other way do we? i agree with goober, they are so not right for each other now. ash has to be the friend now, not lover. and help spence figure out her life before it gets worse. I LUG YOU SO MUCH for this update!!!!
Yeah Spencer you’re a whore but, we still love you. They’re not right for each other right now but, I want them together. Poor Spencer for just lying there and “taking it” with Aiden. Oh gosh! Poor Aiden! Throwing up is the side affect after sleeping with him. I mean, its one thing when someone regrets having sex with you but, its another when they puke after having sex with you. His ego is going to take a beating.
Yeah Spencer you’re a whore but, we still love you. They’re not right for each other right now but, I want them together. Poor Spencer for just lying there and “taking it” with Aiden. Oh gosh! Poor Aiden! Throwing up is the side affect after sleeping with him. I mean, its one thing when someone regrets having sex with you but, its another when they puke after having sex with you. His ego is going to take a beating.