Spencer was nervous. She knew she had to speak to Ashley, but what was she supposed to say? What did she want to hear? Did she really want to tell Ashley to go jump in a lake and drown herself, that she had no interest in rekindling their relationship. Honestly, a part of her had been elated when Ashley told her she still wanted her, but a bigger part of her was so scared. Scared of tears and heartache and of being so in love with Ashley again that she could not think straight. Even worse than that was the realization that she probably still was that much in love with her, her reaction to Ashley’s simple touch had kind of given that away.

As she glanced at a surprisingly quiet Ashley next to her at the lunch table, she was struck again with how beautiful she was. Those dark, dark eyes had always been her weakness and know she finally recognized that look she had earlier wondered about. Ashley looked at peace, like that constant inner struggle had finally laid itself to rest in the years that Spencer had missed out on. She wandered what, or an even more scary thought, who had put that look of contentment there.

Lost in her deep contemplation of Ashley, she did not hear the conversation going on around the table until she saw Ashley’s head snap up towards Paula.

“Sorry, what did you say?’

Spencer glanced at her mother, now very interested in the conversation. She was silently praying that her mother would not start anything.

“I asked if you were looking forward to the wedding, seeing as someone like you probably don’t care much about weddings.”

Ashley frowned and Spencer expected her to blow her fuse, she could tell everyone at the table had the same idea. So it was with some surprise that they registered Ashley’s small chuckle that followed.

“Someone like me? Do you mean a gay person, or, and I think this is the winner, a slutty person?”

Paula’s eyes almost popped out of her head at the sardonic answer. Well, so did everyone else’s really.

“Well, I…uhm…I actually meant someone as free spirited as you. I didn’t think you really believed in monogamy with your history.” There was a beat before she spoke again. “And I thought your were, what’s the word, bi?”